Wednesday, April 27, 2005

Thursday Challenge: Building

Cancer Center & Doctor's Pavilion, Mississippi.
I worked in the hospital adjacent to this building almost every day for fifteen years. This building in many ways represented my life there, uniform, orderly, predictable and reflecting events and people around me. I wonder how many there ever saw the real me, wondered what I did when I wasn't there, considered what I thought about outside, figured out how insecure I felt at times, alone and sole provider for a child. When I first started there I wasn't afraid, now fear almost paralyzes me. I had not been in a hospital for over a year. Recently, I went, not to work but to visit. I walked by the lab, the pathologist's offices and felt the familiar sensations of being where I belonged in one instant and in the next a wave of nausea as panic washed over me. Why do I associate this building with being a "basket case"?
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